Written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 25 July 2009

image for The F Network Cancels "The Wasilla Hillbillies"
Todd and Sarah's eldest son Track shooting wayward reindeer on the Palin's property.

NEW YORK CITY - The Fox Network has finally decided to cancel the reality show, The Wasilla Hillbillies.

The show revolved around the everyday lives of Governor Sarah Palin, her snowmobiling husband Todd, and their five children Track, Bristol, Willow, Piper, Trig, and the Palin's grandson Tripp (whom Grandma Sarah has nicknamed 'Hunting' Tripp).

When the governor announced that she was resigning the governorship the ratings went down considerably.

But there were other factors that contributed to the show's demise. As the show's executive producer Dylan Pimpington pointed out, he fact that Todd was almost always gone attending snowmobile races caused the male viewership to drop considerably.

In the beginning male viewers would tune in to see what kind of sh*t Todd was going to get into with his snowmobiles, or his floatplane, or his one man kayak.

Men liked to sit in front of the TV with a six pack of beer and see Todd fall off his snowmobile and then watch him have to run like hell in the snow to catch it before it destroyed something or hit someone.

The show where the runaway snowmobile hit the Eskimo village, totally destroying three igloos, a totem pole, and a Ice Cream Parlor was the highest rated show of the series.

Another highly rated show was the one where Palin daughter Bristol caught Levi, her boyfriend (and baby's father) trying on her mom's snow boots, snow jacket, and snow bra.

The last show of the series featured a big time argument between Sarah and Todd. In the show, Sarah accidentally looked in Todd's wallet and she found three photographs of Nanicka Zapalicka.

Nanicka is a 27-year-old stunningly gorgeous Eskimo-American salmon fishing guide. Todd just kind of blew the whole thing off by telling Sarah that there was absolutely nothing going on between him and Nani and that he and she were merely just "Soul Mates."

SIDENOTE: The ex-governor is presently working on an autobiographical book. It should be released in September and is titled, My Political Life From Hockey Pucks and Moose Mating Calls To You-Know-Who's Comb Over and Sweater Bullets.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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