A new website - Fiends Disunited - has been launched to help keep divorcees, neighbours from hell, asbo collectors and James Blunt apart.
By filling in a simple registration process, people then build up a profile gaining them points towards their choice from a variety of anti-social equipment including megawatt stereo systems, air gun pellets, 'get out of jail free' cards, magistrate fines, tickets for Big Brother finals and Nectar points.
Launching the new website, inventor Dick D'Chav said:
"With sites such as Facebook, Bebo, Friends Reuinited and Argos Shopping, people are continually being bombarded with 'niceness'.
"I realised that scroats, spivs, chavs, muggers, thieves, ram-raiders, sex offenders and car clampers have nowehere to discuss the less finer things in life, so I thought I should open a forum where they can get together and discuss ways of further imprisonment."
Home Secretary Jacqui Smith said: "While there is no denying that Fiends Disunited is potentially harmful and quite anti-social, I am happy to see that the true spirit of British entrepreneurship - is that a real word? I'd better check with John Prescott - is being demonstrated by its founder.
"The Home Office will, in between losing memory sticks full of personal data, offer grant-aid totalling some £32 + VAT towards the domain registration and basic web hosting for this fantastic venture."
