Written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 23 April 2009

image for American Idol Dumps Lil Rounds and Anoop Desai
American Idol Judge Randy Jackson, shown at the age of three, with his nanny.

HOLLYWOOD - Lil Rounds and Anoop Desai were both sent packing in a double elimination American Idol Show.

The 24-year-old Rounds, who many media members say is aptly named is perhaps the American Idol contestant who changed in appearance more than anyone else in the eight year history of the show; even more than Clay Aiken, Kellie Pickler, or Toyohashi Schwartz.

Rounds literally went from looking a little like Whoopi Goldberg to kind of resembling a young Tina Turner...but only in looks.

A reporter for the music magazine Vocal Cords Illustrated remarked that Lil Rounds is one of the few AI contestants who never got any better the deeper into the competition that she went.

He added that even Whoopi Goldberg could probably out sing her.

Many feel that Rounds' problem was that she came off as sarcastic, arrogant, prima donna-ish, diva-ish, overweigh-ish, and Amish-ish.

When asked why she thought she lost, Lil put down her Artichoke latte and said, "I lost because of four reasons. One, I'm a woman, two, I'm overweight, four, I'm black, and three, I'm lousy at math.

Paula was asked why she thought Rounds lost. And Ms. Abdul teared up and said that Lil had lost because she was overweight.

Kara was asked why she thought that Rounds had lost and she replied that Lil lost because she is a woman.

Randy replied that Lil Rounds lost because she's black and Simon Cowell confessed that the real reason Lil Rounds lost was because she was lousy at math.

When Anoop Desai was asked why he thought that he had lost, he smiled and replied that there is only one reason why he lost and that reason is because he is Indian.

And he noted that Americans have never liked Indians. He said just look at the movies. They hated Geronimo, Sitting Bull, Crazy Horse, Rain-In-The-Face, Sacajawea (The Dollar Squaw), and Burt Reynolds.

When informed that those people were all Native-Americans and his ancestors are all from India, Anoop replied, "You see, that's my point...thank you and good riddance. I think I'll take the next flight out to Cheyenne, Wyoming and go shoot me a buffalo."

In other news. Cindy McCain has just finished her autobiography. It is entitled, "If I Had A Choice Between Being Filthy Rich Or Being Fabulously Beautiful, Both of Which I Am, I Would Choose Both."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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