WASHINGTON, DC - President Obama warned a stunned congress in a secret meeting Wednesday night that America will have to start sharing panties. It is impossible to get them from the Orient since they stopped taking American Dollars.
Having just returned from Allentown, where they had already closed all the factories down, Obama reported that all the looms were long gone and the buildings?
Bombed out graffiti covered rat infested slums, where panties used to be made in America.
Rising costs of utilities are forcing people to wear underwear longer. But the key to surviving the tough times ahead, said Obama, is for people to share:
- panties
- needles
- cigarettes
- pills
Effective immediately, the Cabinet will pair up to share underwear. Obama will pair up with Hillary Clinton.
"We need to act together on the world stage", Obama stated.
