Obama's $787 Billion Economic Stimulus To Be Wired To Nigerian Accounts

Funny story written by Felix Minderbinder

Saturday, 14 February 2009

image for Obama's $787 Billion Economic Stimulus To Be Wired To Nigerian Accounts
Mr. Bansanbunko and friend

WASHINGTON (FMLIVEWIRE) -- The US Congress approved the $787 billion economic stimulus bill on Friday sought by the Obama administration, with the proviso that the money will first be wired to special Nigerian offshore accounts as recommended by senior Congressional Democrats.

The congressional debate featured hysterical denunciations of the stimulus bill by Republicans particularly in the House of Representatives. One congressman waved the current issue of Newsweek magazine, which carries a cynical cover story headlined, "We Are All Socialist Scammers Now."

Yet the Nigerian Chamber of Commerce and nearly every business lobby endorsed the stimulus bill, as corporate America and Nigeria expect to cash in on government contracts, business tax cuts, or to just plain take the money and run.

The billions of dollars will be wired to untraceable accounts held by a "Mr. Owmanungo Bansanbunko" at the Bank of Nigeria for processing in order to obtain certain tax advantages before being routed back to the USA through the Cayman Islands, explained Nancy Pelosi.

"I received a wonderful email offer from Mr. Bansanbunko," said Pelosi. "He is a fine, upstanding man whose wife has leukemia."

The stimulus bill is the largest single appropriations measure ever enacted by Congress. It represents an attempt by the Obama administration to buy time and forestall an immediate collapse of consumer spending and economic activity, while further measures are prepared to bail out the big financial interests.

Despite the right-wing denunciations of the bill as "a socialistic Nigerian scam," it actually represents an effort to prop up the capitalist system through an expansion of federal government spending with shady offshore Nigerian accounts, said Rush Limbaugh.

--Copyright Felix Minderbinder Live Wire

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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