Bunch Of Stuck-Up Crybabies

Written by Bureau

Saturday, 7 February 2009


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Penis Incident happened behind this Hibbing House

An exceptionally cold winter always brings more instances of the annual tragedy of young boys who could not resist the age-old experiment to see what would happen if, in sub-zero temperatures, they tried to lick a metal pole.

In fact, it happened on successive days: a 10-year-old in Hammond, Ind., on Jan. 14 and a 6-year-old in Omaha, Neb., on the 15th.

Both episodes ended badly with traces of the boys' tongues left on the poles, pieces of their self-confidence left shattered on the ground.

"It's kind of like seeing those "Do Not Touch" messages on a wet paint sign, only a lot worse", stated one paramedic. "For some reason you just can't resist feeling the paint."

Even worse, in Hibbing a group of boys gave an apparent nerd a wedgie then pulled his pants down and stuck his penis to a flagpole.

"I'm sure it'll have lasting affects", stated Todd Zimmerman of the Hibbing Fire Department. "It's a good thing he wasn't Jewish and had the skin to spare.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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