Written by queen mudder

Monday, 22 September 2008

image for Battle of Tony Alamo: polygamy nutter tells cops to Fouke off
Tony Alamo gave the Feds the finger

Fouke, Arkansas - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): A police raid on fundamentalist polygamy nutter Tony Alamo's Church of the Prepuberal Hymen Rapture was met with stiff resistance this weekend.

The ex-jailbird pastor accused of Warren Jeffs-type of child crimes had been under FBI surveilance after complaints he was leeching teenage girls' hymens to purge their souls of impurities.

He has told reporters he is the victm of a pubic witch hunt and would 'sue the godless asses off' the Feds who took away a number of his under age parishioners.

But cops were not impressed.

In the 1990s Alamo, 69, spent six years in jail after failing to give the Internal Revenue its rightful cut of his charismatic evangelism business.

Previously he conned millions of dollars out of followers after convincing them his wife - who had died of cancer - would soon be resurrected.

Having placed her decomposing body on display in a makeshift cardboard box at the entrance to his temple he sat back and watched as the $$$s started flowing in.

Six months later the putrid corpse disappeared.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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