Utah State Prison, Utah - (Incandescent Mess): "The Lord has heard my cry and has smitten mine enemy with his bolts of fire!"
That was the triumphant cry this morning as self-styled polygamist nutter and latter-day jailbird Warren Jeffs told prison guards that The Almighty has avenged the recent police raid on his Yearning For Zion concentration camp by smoting down with fire the gubernatorial mansion of Gov Rick Perry in Austin, Texas.
More than 100 firefighters tackled the raging blaze which razed the $25 million residence to the ground after a mysterious bolt of lightning struck kerosene vats outside the garage.
"I feel vindicated," Jeffs, 69, told inmates, "and I feel righteous. The next cataclysm could happen any time and any place, now that The Lord is back on my side.
"Truss me, the Texas Police Chief's hunting lodge looks mighty vulverable right now. As does the Boca Raton condominium of that Judge that fostered out all my little, righteous, underage chickadees..."
Gov Rick Perry is speechless with angst.
