Written by Cliphy

Tuesday, 4 May 2004

Who Was Really Paying Attention During Summer of Terrorist Warnings?

Not recently declassified schedules of Bush Administration officials and Osama Bin Laden (courtesy of Microsoft) from August 7, 2001, one day after President Bush received a Presidential Daily Briefing entitled: "Bin Laden Determined to Attack Inside the United States" :

George W. Bush
August 7, 2001
Crawford, TX

9-10: Breakfast
11-12: Clear brush at ranch
1-3: Golf w/Kenny Boy
3- Nap
Dick Cheney
August, 2001

All Day: Undisclosed
Condoleezza Rice
August, 2001

All Day: Photo Shoot with Vogue
Donald Rumsfeld
August, 2001

All Day: Iraq War Planning
Paul Wolfowitz
August, 2001

All Day: Iraq War Planning
Colin Powell
August, 2001

Osama Bin LAden
Kandahar, Afghanistan

6-7:   Prayers, breakfast (get more non-fat goat milk)
7-9:   Conference call with Grozny (remember to recharge donkey phone)
9-11:  Planning meeting with Mohammed (if he is late again, cut off his left hand) 
11-12: Check on inventory for Cali job (rescreen complete Baywatch DVD's)
12-1:  Lunch (goat with pineapple yogurt again?)
1-2:   Prep for Al Jazeera video (be in makeup by 12:50)
2-3:   Transfer funds to NY (check exchange rates on Yahoo)
3-4:  Prayers (mention wish for Pamela Anderson again to God) 
Evening: Worry about Bush (cancelled)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Summer

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