Sen. Craig reconsiders resigning

Written by Robert W. Armijo

Wednesday, 5 September 2007

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Washington, D.C. - Unlike the Foley incident attempting to turn the page (no pun intended) in the Republican Congressional Page fiasco, Craig should be on the same page (again, no pun intended) taken from the 1994 (and repeated again by one member in 2006) Democrat playbook that turncoat Independent when shunned by their party. Sen. Craig may find turning turncoat for his bathroom stall footloose foreplay with an undercover policeman is the best way for him to survive, say political analysts.

No doubt, Republicans are worried; as they have to strike a balance with their voters by taking a stand against Craig but not leaving him alone out in the cold either for fear he may start wandering too far off the reservation and go completely native, say political analysts.

"We can't afford to push him too far or he may turncoat on us, and that's something we just can't afford right now: a defection," said a spokesperson for the GOP.

Meanwhile, this could a golden opportunity for Craig to come out of the Democrat closet with the way the 2008 Presidential election is shaping up.

That is where the survive turns into thrive, say Democratic political analysts.

"He has done so much political damage to himself offending his constituents," said assistant to the Chair of the Democratic National Party, Bruce Tussle. "Besides, if the Republicans are doing as awful as the polls predict, what will it matter if he retains his seat for a few more years? He'll probably end up losing it to a Democrat anyways. Now is his chance to cut bait and run as a Democratic."

Do not be surprise if other Republicans begin staging such defections among their own constituencies to save their own political skins, predict political analysts.

As did a number of Democrats in 1994, joining in with the Republicans' 'Contract with America' that high-jacketed the Moral Majority into believing they would bring political reform to Washington; resorting to the freighting their constituents with the two-headed bogyman of homosexuality and abortion instead.

Much like this past fall's election of the Democrats quest to slay their twin head beast, only to renege on their political campaign promises to 'Bringing the Troops Home' and 'Impeach Bush Now'. Whatever happened to that, politics as usual, of course?

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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