WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - George Bush's war machine plans to shortly destroy 1,200 targets in Iran with massive airstrikes, the US president said in an exclusive interview with FMLiveWire.
"This war plan is designed to crush Iran's military in three days so the world will be distracted from the global financial crisis caused by our subprime debt fraud and worthless US bonds which everyone has purchased," he said.
While publicly Bush had just accused Tehran of placing the Middle East "under the shadow of a nuclear holocaust," he privately acknowledged that Israel "was the real problem with its huge stockpile of nuclear bombs and its long, ongoing history of theft of Palestinian land and ethnic cleansing of Palestinians."
Bush admitted that he had been ordered to "bomb the hell out of Iran" by Goldman Sachs and AIPAC.
Yet the International Atomic Energy Agency had just last week reported "significant cooperation" with Iran over its peaceful nuclear program of uranium enrichment for civilian electricity generation.
"But Goldman and AIPAC ordered me to destroy Iran's military anyway because I am in their pocket, along with Dick and all the other American quislings in the US government," confided Bush.
"Besides, the US economy and the US dollar are going down the tube anyway, so a little diversion like a new war will distract everyone from that mess and just how terrible a US president I really am," he added.
"The Iran war will also distract people from my failed oil wars in Iraq and Afghanistan that the Zionists and Big Oil and Halliburton and Carlyle had ordered me to do. We will murder at least another 100,000 ragheads in Iran."
Bush candidly outlined the poor prospects for the world once his latest illegal war starts.
"Hey, did you know that when we bomb Iran, it will send oil prices well over $100 per barrel and gasoline over 5 dollars per gallon? Wow, the shit is really gonna hit the fan when the balloon goes up. Hahahahahahahaha! Will the world ever hate the USA then! Everyone overseas will stop using US dollars and dump US investments. Sayonara folks!"
--Copyright Felix Minderbinder Live Wire
