Waiter at P.F. Chang's Doesn't Know What "P.F." Stands For

Funny story written by Heewack

Thursday, 26 July 2007

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I will ask the kitchen, sir

BURBANK, Calif. (Heewack News Network) -- A waiter at a P.F. Chang's China Bistro in Burbank Town Center failed to inspire confidence in his customers when he could not tell them what the "P.F." stood for.

Jared Winslow, 20, an actor-screenwriter who said he is working at P.F. Chang's "between gigs," was partly through his standard recitation of daily specials when customers Enid Glaucoma, 50, and Loretta Bunion, 52, of Salt Lake City, Utah, asked him what the initials stood for.

Winslow stammered for a moment, then mumbled something about "going to the kitchen to find out" before finishing his routine.

"She [Glaucoma] threw me off," Winslow said. "I was halfway through describing the Oolong Marinated Sea Bass when she interrupted with this question out of nowhere."

Winslow avoided the women for several moments, hoping that they would forget the question, but when he returned with their Chang's Chicken Lettuce Wraps appetizer, they asked again if he'd found the answer. Winslow replied that he was "still checking."

"I wasn't impressed," Glaucoma told HNN. "A server is expected to know everything about the menu and the restaurant. It gave me very little faith in his ability to serve us."

Added Bunion, "It reminded me of the time we went to TGIFridays and the waitress didn't know what 'TGI' stood for."

A manager at the Burbank restaurant said he was unaware of the situation, but noted that Winslow had complained earlier of receiving a "lousy tip from some frumps." Calls to P.F. Chang's headquarters in Scottsdale, Ariz., and the restaurant chain's co-founder, Paul Fleming, were not returned.

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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