The White House security detail went to high alert status yesterday when they could not find President George W. Bush. After twenty minutes of diligently searching under beds, in closets, and under tables (his favorite places to hide in games of hide and seek with the staff), the was found outside on the grounds.
Dubya was standing on a ladder and using a hammer and crowbar to remove Amy Carter's treehouse from a stately oak tree.
The treehouse, long one of the President's favorite places to play and have teddy bear picnics, was being dismantled due to comments made by the former President to an Arkansas newspaper. "He said mean stuff about me, so I'm wreckin' his legacy," said the President.
"He wasn't perfect and wasn't even reelected like I was! How can I be the worst if they gave me four more years?"
I don't like Jimmy Carter and I'm not going to be his friend any more!"
At this point, Bush got a splinter in his finger and had to be taken inside. In a White House bathroom, a nurse removed the splinter and bandaged the booboo with a Snoopy band-aid. Laura was then brought from the first ladies office to kiss it better.