Washington DC - (Ass Mess): President Bush hailed UK prime Monster Tony Blair today and said he accepted the news of his resignation from office with sadness not least because he knew that Blair 'has had it coming' after the Queen informed him on Monday evening that the cash-for-peerages police inquiry had got him by the short 'n' curlies.
"But if that goes ok for him sure, I'd be delighted for him to join our Administration here. Bound to be an internship opening in the coming days and weeks.
"And who knows what else might be cookin'?
"Some say 'your goose, George' - but I ain't listenin'! No siree. Got that Nonsee Palloosy right where I wanna, her and them liberal-assed Osama-suckin' war-shy commie-boy suckers. Just ya watch me get m'way with the vetos!"
Meanwhile in London a grim-faced Blair arrived back from his tearjerker swansong farewell at the Trimdon Colliery constituency where thunderous applause greeted his televised resignation.
Wife Cherie tried to cheer things up a bit by humming Things Can Only Get Better for the duration of the one hour flight down from Sedgefield. But Blair remained inconsolable.
A series of goodbye tours is now expected starting with a visit to the Vatican Shitty, then one to the Bogota branch of the Riggs Bank followed by a weekend trip to the Lourdes shrine to Our Lady of the Holy Miracles after a terse hint from his cash-for-peergaes personal attorney.