Written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 25 April 2007

image for Judge affirms post offices are God Squad-free zones
Mail shops affirmed as religion free zones

Hartford, Conn - (Ass Mss): Religious pamphlets, books, stickers, publications and other superstitious God-squad propaganda have no place in "post offices run by churches and other private contractors" after US District Judge Dominic J. Squatrito ruled to uphold the separation of church and state amid Connecticut fundie nutters' fury.

Judge Squatrito said that a recent proliferation of insidious evangelical clap-trap was a clear violation of constitutional rights which demeaned the esteem of law abiding citizens' rights not to be bombarded with insidious propaganda by agenda freaks out to make a fast buck.

Siding with Bertram Cooper, a Navy veteran of World War II and the Korean War who in 2003 sued the postal service and the Sincerely Yours Inc agency of Full Gospel Interdenominational Church post office operators in Manchester, Squatrito upheld the veteran's suit which said that "he became upset when he went to Sincerely Yours".

Quoting Cooper's remarks Squatrito said:

'I'm walking into a place that's doing government business - selling stamps, mailing parcels and so forth - and they're doing this religious bit.'

Cooper said that the operators brazenly flaunted the US constitution by displaying "a label on an exterior wall with the Postal Service's eagle symbol.... along with a Sincerely Yours sign over the threshold".

Inside the countless evangelical displays were adjudged to be constitutionally, ethically and spiritually polluting.

"Some like to twist the knife into the First Amendment," Squatrito said today.

"Selling the Afterlife is one hell of a big racket.

"But it ain't gonna continue while I'm the judge in this court."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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