STURGIS, South Dakota – (Satire News) - The biggest coming-together of bikers anywhere in the world has just hit the tiny, little town of Sturgis, South Dakota.
The local newspaper reported that the town is so small, that the stop signs are made of red particle board. They pointed out that the Greyhound bus station only has nine seats.
The local authorities say that most of the bikers are Trump supporters, and they have made it known that they will not be wearing masks. One biker said that he has the MAGA letters tattooed on his tongue.
Most of the men have very heavy ZZ Top-like beards, as do a few of the biker chicks.
A life-long local resident said that she could not believe some of the extremely nasty tattoos that some of the beautiful biker girls had.
One biker from Chicago, who was holding a bottle of El Matador Tequila in each hand, said that the bike rally is a damn good place to find a future wife.
The 10-day event will feature tons of beer, whiskey, tequila, topless women, and a various array of marijuana strains, including Colorado's best Durango Bango.
Several bands will be performing throughout the event. Some of these include Kid Rock, Toby Keith, WD-40, the Sopapilla Sisters Band, and the astounding Willie Nelson, who is 87 years young.