Blocked Writer Relieved to Realize No One Cares whether He Writes Anything Ever Again

Funny story written by Chrissy Benson

Friday, 2 August 2019

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Unfettered by public expectations, writer Russ Hanson finds the freedom of invisibility no less than intoxicating.

Russell Hanson of New York City, a longtime legal writer and aspiring fiction author who'd been feeling somewhat panicked to find himself running low on ideas for new novels and short stories, breathed a sigh of relief when it occurred to him that no one cared whether he ever wrote more fiction ever again.

"I'd felt like I was letting people down by not continuing to create," said Hanson. "But then I realized that virtually no one's even noticed the stuff I have written. So they certainly won't miss my work if I stop producing. Whew!"

Hanson acknowledged that the public who have taken note of his work, particularly his own mother, may feel some vague sense of loss if he stops writing his signature quirky stories and pun-laden prose altogether. "But she'd understand," said Hanson. "I don't think it would change anything between us."

Paradoxically, Hanson says that the awareness that, apart from the paid legal writing he does to make ends meet, he's under absolutely no pressure from anyone to write another thing in his life ever again, has freed up his creativity in a way he's never before experienced. Indeed, he describes the freedom of invisibility as "no less than intoxicating."

"I'm on fire," sad Hanson, clearly relishing his newfound artistic vibrancy. "There's nothing like not being bound by expectations. I sense this is going to be a whole new chapter in my career."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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