It's been revealed that President Trump's skill at lying (oh, excuse me, -- alternative facts) can be traced back to the secret hiring of the little-known position of Secretary of Not-Lies.
The man that has accepted the position is a resident of New York City by the name of George Costanza, who has also gone by the moniker 'George Can't-Standya'.
Apparently, Mr. Costanza is adept at lying regarding all manner of things, such as his job, his sexual prowess, and his architectural creations. As a fellow New Yorker, Costanza seemed the obvious choice, as President Trump doesn't trust anyone, and is just as paranoid as Mr. Costanza, only multiplied by about 980 per cent.
Mr. Costanza's mantra , "It's not a lie if you believe it" has become Trump's mantra, as well as "Orange, orange, aren't you glad I'm orange", and "Fake news isn't as hot as fake boobs', as Trump takes lessons from the balding, husky New Yorker in stretching the truth, inventing alternative facts, and ignoring logic in the face of reality.
The Democrats have countered this recent move by hiring Stephen Colbert as the Secretary of Truthiness.
