Washington, DC The Republican Party, after the 2016 Republican Convention nominated Donald Trump and Mike Pence for its official candidates, woke up and realized it was really happening and not just a bad dream. Realizing they were headed for one of the most party-destroying train wrecks ever, they knew they had to do something. So resorted to one of their old tried, but true solutions-bribery!
They realized they couldn't just use money to get Trump to quit, so they pooled all their money, foreign (slave) labor, and influence to offer Trump two billion dollars, a guarantee that Forbes Magazine would always put him in the Top Ten Richest in the World list, and the Hawaiian islands of Lanai and Molokai if he will quit the Presidential race.
Trump is said to be considering the offer.
