Written by Drunyon9290

Tuesday, 2 September 2014

Northeast, Mexico- Local Mexican woman named, Leandra Becerra Lumbreras tells authorities that she believes she is 127 years old; this would make her the oldest living person to ever roam this earth. According to the Guinness book of world records, the oldest recorded person lived to 122 years old, her name was Jeanne Calment.

Becerra does not have a valid birth certificate to back up her story, when presenting this fact to the John Voth, editor of the Guiness Book of World Records he had this to say; "A,real,in the flesh birth certificate does not matter anymore. Hell, our president cant even come up with a real one and is anyone questioning him?" He plans on publishing her story in the 2016 edition.

"Great, great, great, great, great,great, great grandma gets around very well still. The only ailments holding her back are her cataracts, deafness, and her random spells of dementia which seem to last a few years at a time; other than that, she is doing great!" stated her 7x great granddaughter, who is now 36.

If you spend a day with Becerra you will hear endless made up, incorrect stories of her past add her involvement in "History". She will tell you about the Spanish revolution and how it happened in her head. She will also tell the wrong day in which man set foot on the moon, and finally she will always close story time by fading off mid sentence into a 3 day hibernation.

"She will be recognized as a true, Mexican hero." stated her 54 year old husband. Becerra may be one of the most unique figures in our lifetime, or better yet, the past 3 lifetimes.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Old People, Mexicans

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