Written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 14 April 2014

image for A Volcano Expert From Bombay, India Predicts That Rhode Island's Volcano Will Erupt On September 13, 2014
A photo of Greenland's Mount Jolly Good as it erupted on April 29, 2001.

PROVIDENCE, Rhode Island - The citizens of Providence and the state of Rhode Island have become quite alarmed after hearing the prediction of a volcano expert who lives in Bombay, India.

The mayor of Providence received an email from a Mr. Primgar Kalapoli who stated that for the past 57 years he has been a pretty good predictor of where and when volcanoes will erupt.

Kalapoli uses a state-of-the-art computer generated formula that he says he devised over a period of 26 years.

He accurately predicted the eruption of Washington state's volcano Mount St. Helens back on May 18, 1980.

Kalapoli also correctly predicted the eruption of Greenland's Mount Jolly Good on April 29, 2001.

And now he is predicting that Rhode Island's Mount Pearl P. Dafty will erupt on September 13, 2014 between noon and 1:15 pm.

SIDENOTE: Mount Pearl P. Dafty, which was named after Republican state Senator Pearl P. Dafty, is located 29.7 miles west of Providence in the heart of rutabaga country.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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