Rampant poison ivy slashes $15m from asking price of Annie Liebovitz's $30m West Village mansion

Funny story written by queen mudder

Thursday, 6 February 2014

image for Rampant poison ivy slashes $15m from asking price of Annie Liebovitz's $30m West Village mansion
Liebovitz is said to be feeling gutted after gutting and restoring three adjoining town houses now crumbling under the ivy

New York - An infestation of highly virulent poison ivy growing all over the external elevations of photographer Annie Liebovitz's West Village mansion has seen the property's value plummet by over $15 million according to a structural engineer's report.

755 Greenwich Street was earlier valued at a cool thirty million bucks after Liebovitz's refurb of three adjoining town houses created one splendid and very cool home.

"Yeah, but that's before some psychotic landscape gardeners got into Annie's head," local NYC realtor Dolores Condo-Slasha commented, "and insisted on planting all this evergreen creeper up the newly repointed red brick walls."

The resulting rampant growth has created subterranean heave as the highly invasive ivy has burrowed deep into the brickwork, penetrating structural supports and high tech electrics, the realtor warned.

Recently the property was the subject of much media speculation that it had been purchased for a 'bargain' $28 million by George W Bush's niece Lauren Bush and her designer husband David Lauren.

"Twenty eight million bucks, you gotta be kidding!" Ms Condo-Slasha added.

"All that poisonous vegetation will have to come down on health and safety grounds before the new NY Mayor Bill De Blasio goes bonkers.

"I value the building at less that half a mill."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot