'It's A Bum Rap Your Honor' Anus Al-Liby tells NY judge

Funny story written by queen mudder

Thursday, 17 October 2013

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Anus Al-Liby complained about housekeeping standards on board the CIA's Mediterranean cruise ship

New York - Suspected Al Qaeda terrorist Abu Anus Al-Liby has told New York Southern District Judge Lewis Kaplan that the CIA has framed him on multiple counts after roughing him up on a Mediterranean 'cruise'.

Al-Liby - real name Nazih Abdul-Hamed al-Ruqai - was appearing before the same judge who is currently hearing Chevron's RICO racketeering case against Amazonbotch lawyer Steven Donziger following an earlier indictment by a New York grand jury in 2000.

That due process failed to proceed after Al-Liby managed to give his captors the slip before legging it to Tripoli, Libya where a CIA snatch squad recently caught him napping.

Legal sources on the periphery of the case have claimed the Libyan might be a distant relation of disbarred ex-Dick Cheney stooge Lewis 'Scooter' Libby, a White House official who f++ed up badly in the Valerie Plame yellowcake uranium outing affair.

At Wednesday's hearing before Judge Kaplan a pissed-as-hell Al-Liby complained vociferously at being taken on one of the CIA's special Mediterranean Fall Cruises and subjected to a NCIS-style interrogation aboard the USS San Antonio.

But Federal prosecutors told a packed courtroom that Al-Liby was wanted for a decades-long string of attacks on US interests in East Africa for which he'd earned a FBI 'Most Wanted' legend with a $5m bounty on his head.

At the end of the hearing he failed to make bail and was ordered to a high-security detention facility until further notice.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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