Written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 9 July 2013

image for US whistleblower claims US National Archives gagged reports of 'bricked up train full of skeletons'
Image from the First Class compartment

New York - Reports about a collapsed subterranean tunnel on a defunct spur of Manhattan's IRT trunk line containing a 'bricked-up train full of skeletons' were erased from US national records according to CIA whistleblower Edward Snowden.

The fugitive from justice has promised to tweet the exact location of the catastrophe which occurred some time under Lyndon B Johnson's presidency in the 1960s but was deleted from the public domain on national security grounds.

Historians have pointed out that officially, the trunk line closed in July 1918 and was split into new lines creating the Broadway - Seventh Avenue, Lexington Avenue and 42nd Street Shuttle lines.

But conspiracy theorists close to Snowden's inner cabal who have researched stuff about Richard Nixon's alleged hiring of mobster hit men to assassinate President John F Kennedy have come across this latest data which asks if Tricky Dicky's gangsters were part of the train's 'entombment' after collecting a megabux payoff in NYC for the November 1963 JFK hit.

"These guys died fleeing New York with a payload of gold bullion ingots," a WikiFreaks source explained today, "after highjacking a track maintenance train and driving it away through a catacomb of disused NYC tunnel line."

A botched op by the FBI then saw the accidental detonation of explosive devices which partially destroyed a disused spur line somewhere under Manhattan.

Expect the NYC map coordinates to be tweeted by Snowden when he finally arrives at his Caracas safe house.

Julian Assange is daft as a brush.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!





Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
75 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more