Long Island DA swoops on solicitation bottom feeders

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 4 June 2013

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Long Island - "Luckily nobody resident in Lily Pond Lane is on the solicitation roll call of shame," an East Hampton pool man commented, "but come August when the Clintons are vacationing here again, maybe the DA will get lucky a second time round."

The roll call sees over 100 Nassau County professions in the solicitation frame after an online police sting on potential hooker clients.

A fake website was constructed as part of the op, quickly becoming inundated with requests for high-end commercial sex workers.

But their assignments quickly and unexpectedly with undercover cops posing as harlots arresting dozen upon dozen of stooges who'd thought they'd booked bona fide hos via the BadAssGals.con site.

This morning the mugs shots were posted in a name and shame exercise designed to out a definitive who's who of Long Island solicitation perps.

Police source have described their haul of johns as numerous lawyers, doctors, a surgeon, two dentists, a Supreme Court judge, two college professors, half a dozen teachers, a pair of realtors, eight financial advisers, five taxation accountants, a well known White House lobbyist, a mortician and dozens of just regular guys.

An Amagansett quickie blow job still retails at around $50.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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