New Haven, Connecticut - The US President's obituary has appeared in a Bonesmen's online site in what excited Tea Party activists have hailed as an act of pure prescience.
Yeah, right.
Capitol Hill aides were quick to rubbish the posting which hints heavily at the President's 'auto-erratic asphyxiation' inside a closet in the Queen's Bedroom Suite at the White House's hospitality wing.
By lunchtime the website had received almost one million hits, mainly from terrified Joe Biden detractors who fear the Obama Veep's meteoric rise to the White House hot seat.
And the appointment of Hillary Clinton as Biden's new No 2 in a hasty recalibration of the Democratic Administration.
"Uh, news of the President's death is a total exaggeration," White House spokesperson Jay Carney tweeted, "ditto the bit about ligatures and anal nitrate stuff."
Carney also noted the last certified Bonesman in the White House was one George W Bush, who recently reinvented himself as a watercolor painter of pooches.
A Dubya shaggy dog portrait retails around fifty bucks.
