Lance Armstrong Hit by Further Problems with Drug Re-Classification

Funny story written by Collins_and_Dutton

Thursday, 15 November 2012

image for Lance Armstrong Hit by Further Problems with Drug Re-Classification

As well as suffering the humiliation of having his 7 Tour de France titles stripped from him Lance Armstrong today suffered a further blow when the UK Government confirmed that he has been re-classified as a Class A drug.

Possession of Armstrong can now lead to a £5,000 fine and up to 6 months in prison whilst if you are caught dealing in Armstrong then you could face a life sentence.

Left wing campaigners believe that the sanctions are too harsh and that simply sending people who have a history of Armstrong abuse to jail is not tackling the root problem.

Indeed there are concerns that so called 'light' Armstrong users may become exposed to heavier and more destructive Armstrong abuse inside prisons where Armstrong is believed to be widely available.

The UK Home Secretary however defended the Governments tough stance by stating that "we as a society cannot and will not tolerate the pedalling of Armstrong in this country".

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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