Condom Law Passes in LA County

Funny story written by Spicewood

Thursday, 8 November 2012


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Los Angeles County voters recently passed a ballot initiative mandating that pornographic film actors wear condoms during sex scenes, prompting J. Thorton Skinner, Executive Secretary of PORN, a trade group, to state, "We won't take this frontally. we have various positions we can take, and we intend to explore all of them."

Squeeze Memore, porn star stated, "I am allergic to latex, and lamb intestine gives me a rash and in this line a work, a horrible red rash does not photograph well."

Skinner went on to say, "Filming, ah well, what I am trying to say is that, sometimes in a movie like these, the "last" thing to happen is sometimes highlighted and well, it is a sensitive area, so to speak, and it can happen that wearing the condom, well the thing they do when that happens, well, it just is not there, confined in that condom, regardless of the type. Whew."

The Los Angeles County District Attorney expressed concern on how the new law would be enforced. He indicated that their budget did not allow for any additional personnel and that policing this law would be relegated to present personnel. Chief Beck indicated that already, 2,135 policemen had volunteered.

The porn industry generates large tax revenue dollars for the county, and this new law may cause the industry to find another location where condoms are not mandated. Apparently they have made inquiries about possible facilities in Oregon, where the movie "Free Willy" was filmed.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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