Killer bees swarming in 'grim reaper' formation outside Queen's bedroom

Funny story written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 20 April 2011

image for Killer bees swarming in 'grim reaper' formation outside Queen's bedroom
Bizarre apian karmic ritual ahead of HM's birthday

London - A psychopomp of 'africanised' bees has been spotted swarming outside HM's bedroom window Palace sources reported today.

Hellfire Club soothsayers fear the colony may be gathering in a traditional midwife-to-the-dying rite, sparked by unseasonally high temperatures.

The funerary heralds and their pall-bearer aides were last spotted before the Queen Mother's own RIP.

Thousands of whip-poor-wills - North American nightjars of the Caprimulgus Vociferus genus - 'shat their guts out' all over Clarence House lawns in a bizarre avian karmic ritual.

'Millions' of the nightjars' first cousins - known as chuck-will's-widow (Caprimulgus Carolinensis) - later bombed the Princess Diana Memorial Fountain with gallons of cuckoo spit.

The subsequent clean-up rivalled last year's Gulf of Mexico Deepwater Horizon oil spill remediation.

Last week Palace quacks voiced their fears that a spate of nosebleeds will see HM drop dead before the April 29 royal wedding.

"Kinda ironic!" a Good Friday Agreement source chuckled today.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more