Written by grimbo

Monday, 18 April 2011

image for Hotel Bans Staff From Speaking Welsh

A popular hotel on the island of Anglesey has banned staff from speaking Welsh on health and safety grounds.

The management at the Carreg Mon hotel near Llanfairpwll has instructed all staff to speak only English within the grounds of the hotel or they will face disciplinary action.

General manager Ruth Hogan explains :

"This unusual measure has reluctantly been taken after a number of concerns were expressed by staff.

We experienced an unprecedented high level of persons complaining of flu symptoms last month. At that time our head chef Brian Tambling noticed that mucus droplets were often being propelled through the air when the native speaking kitchen staff were using some of the more voiced uvular fricatives common to the Welsh language.

When samples of our dishes were analysed at the local police lab, it was confirmed that many of them contained dangerously high levels of flu bacteria".

Hogan concluded by saying that, after taking advice from the Health and Safety Executive, the decision was taken that it would be in the best interests of everyone concerned for the use of the Welsh language to be banned from the immediate environs in and around the Carreg Mon.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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