'Plot to assassinate Colonel Gaddafi' vindicated says cock-a-hoop ex-MI5 spook

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Monday, 21 March 2011

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Shayler seen in one of his disguises shortly before rebranding himself as prescient tarot reader Delores Kane

London - The disgraced former renegade spy has said his 1999 claims were bang on the money as UN forces pounded the Libyan capital this weekend.

"I was prescient, ahead of my time," the former intelligence officer told reporters, "where's my goddam compensation cheque?"

Shayler's 1998 revelations (Chapter 666/9-11) accused the British government of plotting to kill the Libyan despot.

He claimed to have seen Top Secret files detailing a £100,000 payment to a British agent called 'Tunworth', hired by John Major's government to mount the murderous plot.

This James Bond-style double-O operative was subsequently identified by the UK Fraud Squad as Saif Al-Gaddafi, the notorious LSE doctorate plagiariser and top suspect behind the Iraq War's Dodgy Dossier.

Shayler has since been branded a nutjob following self publicising claims of divinity, ability to influence the weather, prevent terror attacks and predict UK football scores.

His website says the born-again psychic has now rebranded under a transvestite ID of Delores Kane - an astonishing tarot reader who predicted Prince William's engagement to Kate Middleton as far back as 2000.

Richard Tomlinson is 101.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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