London - (Dead-as-a-Dodo Mess): The Daily Torygraph is preparing readers for the Queen's imminent death by putting a big black border around its online edition pages.
"We've seen the portents in The Spoof website," royal humbug editor Percy Snodgrass said today.
"One headline that really rattled us was Ammit the Devourer stalks Queen's soul in Remembrance Day shocker! - because it's prediction tallies with the Last Secret of Fatima."
The paper is also backed by Hellfire Club grandees in the Royal British Legion who lost a packet in successive financial scandals started by the Queen.
The Brinks-Matt bullion heist and the collapse of Northern Crock Bank saw 90% of Hellfire Club holdings reduced to junk bond status.
Prince Philip may also drop dead 'very soon' in a RIP double-whammy in time for Xmas.
Queen Elizabeth's shameless leeching of other disasters such as Equitable Life, BCCI, Bernard Madoff's ponzi scam and the sell-off the the nation's bullion reserves by 'prudent' UK chancellor Gorgon Brown are a case in point.
