Written by Everyman

Sunday, 12 September 2010

Hey!

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Nick Clegg's cock causes embarassment in Downing Street
Clegg's policies - cock-eyed?

Nick Clegg's cock is increasingly a cause of embarrassment within Number 10 Downing Street, this website can reveal. "It is enormous" said one female aide:"You walk into a room and, you know, there it is. It's very distracting because you can't concentrate on anything else."

Nick Clegg bought the cock during a trip to Mexico - when he saw it at an illegal fight in Itzapalapa. He smuggled it through customs in a diplomatic bag - and it has been his constant companion ever since. The cock - who is known as "Cock" - sits in the corner of the room during the Deputy PM's meetings. Clegg speaks to the bird in Spanish - something civil servants find very offputting, as most do not speak the language having studied Classics at Oxford.

David Cameron will not be drawn on the issue: "Nick's cock is his own business. I personally don't have a problem with it, but I don't think Nick would mind those who are uncomfortable with his cock, talking to him about it."

He then paused: "I am more bothered about the fact that his penis keeps flopping out of his flies."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: Nick Clegg




Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
45 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more