Mandy - the name generally given for Felix Mandleshon, a famed composer before entering politics - has written his memoirs.
A member of the powerful secret Brandenburg Group - named after one of his much loved Concertos - Mandy writes with great authority on the subject of politics.
Known as the Third Man, Mandy has been writing about cleaning up the sewers of Westminster. 'I don't mind getting my hands dirty' he explained.
Lord Mandy is being joined in the House of Lords by Comrade Prescott, an old mate who has contributed little to Mandy's memoirs. 'We are from different strands of Socialism' said Prescott 'I am from genuine, honest Labour. He is from another strand - but a very worthy one I am sure.'
The two old mates are planning to take the Lords by storm, with their followers invading the chambeers to add to Mandy's exploration of the sewers.
'A belief that sewers are only full of Brown shit is quite untrue' Mandy stressed 'I should know I have been close to the Brown stuff for years. No, the sewers are streaming with Tory piss and liberally eliminated sperm which clegg up the system terribly.'
Of his book Mandy joyfully cried; 'It is all here. Come and enjoy it with me by reading my serialised story in the Sunday Smear.
