Totalitarian Timelord Enrages 'Doctor Who' Enthusiasts

Funny story written by Timothy Jesuit

Sunday, 16 May 2010

image for Totalitarian Timelord Enrages 'Doctor Who' Enthusiasts
That tardis looks so fake...

Doctor Who fans were baffled last night as the BBC mistakenly broadcast an edited episode intended for the Chinese market.

Fans' forums erupted in futile despair as what seemed like a tense, well-crafted allegory for the potential of human endeavour ended with the Doctor regenerating into a fourteen-year-old girl who immediately sang for ten minutes in tribute to China's noble workers.

The girl then went out to denounce herself as representative of Western imperialism and arrogance and warn of the coming of a better, more efficient Doctor from a more Eastern planet in the near future.

User TaRdiS88 commented, "Smith = WORST DOCTOR EVER. Had just about forgiven him for the overacting but if he can't even go a whole episode without turning into a Chinese girl then I don't think there's much hope for him. Back to my Baker DVDs - couldn't care less about this series now."

The sentiment was widely reflected across the Internet, with only a few dissenting voices allowed to pipe up. One such voice, ElDoctoro, pointed out that "This could all tie in to the series arc somehow. Wait until the last episode - my guess is that [spoiler]the crack is an allegory for China.[/spoiler] Not sure what China is an allegory for, though."

The BBC last night issued a terse statement, saying only, "An error occurred in the production office. As a result, the Chinese edit of the episode was broadcast instead of the British one. BBC Worldwide wholeheartedly rejects any notion that its programmes are unduly altered with for foreign markets and hopes to continue its long and fruitful co-operation with China."

No Chinese person was available for comment.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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