British Airways boss Willie Walsh has announced his latest plans for beating industrial action. He has hired UKIP leader Nicholas Farage to pilot the companies planes. This strike busting move will clearly upset union bosses, but Walsh was unrepentant.
"We will not be held to ransom by the unions. Farage was available, having failed to get elected, yet again. He was keen to continue his flying experience. Once we teach him how to land, he'll be fine. We keep telling him to aim for the pretty lights on the runway, but he insists on landing on the green English countryside."
Farage is just the first of BA's potential strike breakers. Stevie Wonder has also been approached, in a bid to highlight the company's diversity policy. Stephen Hawking is said to be in talks about becoming a flight attendant, whilst the John Denver Foundation is expected to make strike breaking donations.