The Metropolitan Police have warned perverts to stay away from airport picket lines as the industrial dispute there rumbles on.
Perverts from all over the country have been heading to the airport to mingle with striking cabin crew and rub surreptitiously up against them on the picket lines.
It is thought that the perverts finally realised that a cabin crew strike picket line would be manned by attractive trolley dollies, so they decided to take full advantage of the situation.
Perverts have been arriving in a steady stream from all over the country, causing a massive headache for security staff with their rubbing up against the attractive ladies and their unrestrained drooling.
One pervert, from Warrington, told us:
"I come down on the train for this. It's like being in Stringfellows but it's all free. As soon as I realised that a cabin crew strike would involve them sexy birds what demonstrate the life belts in the aisle before take off, I just had to come! And I have! Wwwaahhheeey!!!"
But the perverts aren't getting things all their own way. Many of the strikers are accompanied by their partners, usually big, hulking blokes, one of whom told us:
"If some dirty bastard goes rubbing up against my Missus's arse on that picket line, I'll kick his fucking teeth in. And no mistake."
More as we get it.
