Banker sues newspaper for verbal abuse

Funny story written by MonkeyInTheBath

Saturday, 5 December 2009

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Bankers don't always keep money in pet pigs

Jim McJimminy, CEO of the Bank of London, has successfully sued the Daily Blah newspaper, for publishing what he describes as "vicious abuse" in a column last month.

The newspaper article talked about "greedy corrupt bankers". It said that banking was now one of the least respected trades and should possibly be abolished altogether. Mr McJimminy was specifically named in the column as an example of a greedy corrupt banker.

The prosecution argued that the newspaper column belittled bankers, which was effectively a form of persecution of a minority. Lawyer Kevin O'Kevinny explained: "It is a lazy stereotype that all bankers are greedy, it's like a form of racism. Bankers have the same rights as the rest of us, they're not inferior and it's certainly wrong to exterminate them. They might talk different, and dress different, but that doesn't mean we should look down on them. We should respect the bankers' culture, and they should respect ours. The sooner we can all learn to live together the better."

Mr McJimminy won 7 million pounds in compensation and is said to be very happy with the outcome.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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