Union of Unemployed Workers makes demands

Funny story written by MonkeyInTheBath

Wednesday, 2 December 2009

image for Union of Unemployed Workers makes demands
Unemployed striker defaces pavement

The Union of Unemployed Workers (UUW) have made demands to the UK Government that their non-working conditions be improved, or else they shall go on strike.

The specific improvements they have asked for are:

- Free tea and coffee at the JobCentre,

- The Jeremy Kyle Show to be repeated no more than twice in any given day,

- Increase of unemployment benefits to cover the cost of living on a basic (non)working wage,

- To make it illegal to "sack" an unemployed person, or otherwise force them into a job,

- Fresh cushions to be provided once a year to ensure that the unemployed's "sitting on their arse" skills are kept sharp.

The Government have not yet responded to the UUW, but a spokesman was said to be relaxed about the prospect of an unemployment strike, saying "It would just like in the 70s when we had the 3 day week. Except that it would be a 7 day week."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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