Britain not racist?

Funny story written by M F

Wednesday, 21 October 2009

image for Britain not racist?

Who said we were a multi national, ethnically rich and a happy society? I've just been to Bradford to check a few of these facts out. To my shock, 99% of families failed to contain the correct proportion of ethnic cultures.

The new law, The Full Intergration of Minorities Act 2008, brought in at the end of 2008 is yet to be fully enforced, however comments have been made that this will only affect the lower classes as the royal family has claimed their stake as far right wing Germans for whom the law does not affect.

I interviewed Mr Patel, a local Hindu in Bradford, originally from Bangladesh, who advised me that it is just not possible for him to have non hindu members within his family organistaion. Trading standards have requested the family increase their recruiting drive to promote caucasian or african recruits to join his family. He has spent nearly £700 on advertising for new members with only one male applicant so far.

His daughter, Geeta, is most unhappy that her arranged marriage may have to be to a non hindu, especially as her disability is the only thing currently keeping her farther from prosecution. Mr Patel is hoping for at least two more applicants to come forward before the end of the year or he faces fines of up to £10,000.

In another interview with a man called Nick Griffin, I discovered that he had managed to successfully advertise positions on a national scale for non white native caucasians within his organisation, but yet again, like Mr Patel, was having very few applicants.

With regards to The Full Intergration of Minorities Act 2008, he advised that due to his position of responsibility within society and his organisation, he will not have to adhere to the new law on a family level until 2011, however, he doubted his chances of successfully advertising for such candidates when the time arises.

Other families in the area are joining forces and trading family members on an underground black market, where by more common ethnic groups are preparing to bid large sums of money to secure minority ethnic members.

Local enforcement agencies are preparing to break such illegal trading rings as the law was not intended to create such illicit operations. Clamping down on these activities will ensure a good return on fines and charges to the local community and ensure new government prison camps can be built for those unwilling to intergrate.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more