Written by Earl Grey

Tuesday, 7 July 2009

image for Immigrants "Not Queue Jumping"
People Are Moving From The Queue To Benches

Immigrants are not jumping the housing queue a report has said. The report by the Ron Atkinson Centre For Reformed Public Figures said that immigrants were not getting preferential treatment. The truth is that there is a shortage of social housing so everybody is in the same boat-or guest house.

Not everyone accepts the reports findings. In the Daily Mail Charlie Wasp said "They come over here and get given a 10-bedroom mansion in Roehampton. British homes for British workers. Ban the Unions. Keep Britain White. Etc, etc." Such views are fairly typical of large sections of society. The recent electoral success of the British Numpty Party reinforces such views.

What is the opinion of the people in the queue? Mr Derrick Pringle said "I've been in this que for over 20 years now. When I first joined the queue they promised me a home by Christmas. Now they promise me Christmas in a home. It's the shortage of social housing that's to blame, not immigrants."

However, Mr Ray Illingworth, disagreed. "Listen, when I first joined the queue everybody spoke English. Now it's all Punjabi or Swahili or other mumbo bloody jumbo. I'm not being racist but...... oh actually I am being racist."

The real issue is that a social home has not been constructed in Britain since 1979. Government spokesperson Eddie Hemmings said "Er... right.... er.... well... Rome wasn't built in a day. We will investigate all of the claims. Really."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Immigration




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