MP Fills Second Trough at the Taxpayer's Expense

Funny story written by Roy Turse

Tuesday, 12 May 2009

image for MP Fills Second Trough at the Taxpayer's Expense
The Bedwetter Estate in Suffolk

Backbench Conservative MP Monty Bedwetter has admitted today that he has claimed for the refilling of a trough in London, when he actually keeps his snout in an even larger trough in Suffolk.

Using the lax expenses controls to his advantage, he subsequently declared that he had moved his snout to the London trough and then arranged for the Suffolk trough to be refilled, again paid for out of the public purse.

Although Mr Bedwetter claims expenses for two troughs, he owns several, including one on the Suffolk coast and one in the Algarve. Additionally, a company he owns, Porcine Developments, has built several hundred low-cost pigsties on green-belt land which are rented out.

His three young sons have all owned property, although two of their houses were built using sub-standard organic materials and were recently blown down. They now cohabit the third, brick-built property.

Mr Bedwetter attempted to justify his expenses by comparing MPs to the private sector. "If an MP goes to market, but a company director stays at home. Or a bank executive has roast beef when I have none, then it's quite reasonable that I should claim for 'me, me, me', all the way home."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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