London - (Les Jeux Son Faites Mess): Police investigating the scandal of MPs' expenses have stumbled on a casino hidden deep beneath 10 Downing Street.
The opulent Las Vegas-style gambling den appears to be modelled on Seizures Palace and was installed in 1997 by Gorgon Brown during his first month as Chancellor of the Exchequer.
Behind its guilt(sic)-edged purple velour-swagged drapery lie convenient gadgets like a Lord Levy-designed, custom-built remote-controlled Northern Crock hole-in-the-wall cashpoint spurting out five hundred Euro banknotes at the touch of a button.
Brown authorised the casino's installation following the 1997 election after an IMF psychic tipped him the wink about numerology sequences for the National Lottery.
Builders secretly worked round the clock at night while Prime Monster of the day Tony Blair and family were ensconced in the private residential flat above No 11 next door.
"We reckon Brown's been shagging Joanna Lumley on the croupier's table," a New Scotland Yard source hinted today.
