Doris Johnson, Mayor of Olde London Towne, today announced the latest measure in a raft of measures designed to combat the energy crisis and slow down global warming.
"We'll turn off the Aurora Borealis at night for a bully off," she told a packed press conference. "The northern lights are an extravagance we simply cannot afford any more and the drain on public resources to light up the skies in the far north - all for free mind - cannot be allowed to continue."
Coservative Party Leader David Cameron told us privately that this was yet another example of New Labour's outrageous misappropriation of public funds. He slammed the Aurora Borealis as a complete waste of taxpayer's money, particularly those such as himself, who will be subjected to the new 50% high end tax.
Other measures proposed by the Conservatives are said to include: a total ban on domestic heating, closing down all public libraries and a 75% tax levy on charity shops.
And a new red box for the next budget as the old one is looking a bit worse for wear.
More as we get it.