Written by queen mudder

Thursday, 23 April 2009

image for Aliens made me what I am says Susan Boyle
From the CIA's X-Files photo album

London - (X-Files Mess): Cloned in a hideous alien experiment from a hybridised freak ovum supplied by Queen Elizabeth II..... and fertilised by a rogue spermatozoon ejaculated by one of the Bush family gangsters?

That's the conclusion of the CIA's X-Files division after Susan Boyle's secret medical records revealed that her grizzly gestation took place on an extraterrestrial saucer circa the winter of 1960.

"The physical resemblance to the Al Qaeda Puppet Monarch is of course startling - right down to the dodgy Stalinist hairdo and retard rictus grin," one spooky insider at the President George Herbert Bush Center For Intelligence (sic) commented today.

Boyle has been coy all week about her alien origins although an autobiography "My early life aboard the motherfuckingship" is in the effing.

Some of the accompanying photographs could be patented as a non-medical form of emetic.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more