Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 23 April 2009

image for Susan Boyle Visits Hairdresser
Susan afterwards

Susan Boyle, the 47-year-old virgin singing sensation, has taken the advice of media style gurus who told her she was 'a bit nunty' and given her dour image a re-vamp.

The unemployed and sexless church worker attended an appointment at one of London's premier hairdressing salons for the nuntily-coiffed, Purple Rinse off the Kings Road, and asked them to:

"Lob it all off, hen!"

Astonished onlookers stood and gasped as the salon's most experienced stylist, Alison, 12, attacked Susan's motley barnet as if her future haircutting career depended on it, and the result left everyone shocked.

Boyle, though, was pleased with her new style. The woman with eyebrows like Leonard Brezhnev, said:

"Just wait till Piers sees me now! He won't be able to keep his filthy hands off me!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Susan Boyle




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