Written by Duff

Wednesday, 1 April 2009

image for 2p Rise on Petrol and Diesel set to get Everybody at it
Black gold - Texas tea. Oilman Jed Clampett's legacy to the world spotted here in Wembley

Chancellor of the exchequer, Alastair Darling, in an amazing bit of political stuff has whacked 2p on petrol but that's not the half of it.

Speaking from his £1,500,000 a week penthouse, paid for by expenses, he told The Spoof.com:

"Times is tight and I feel a bit of a git putting up juice but here's the deal. Get a length of rubber piping and instead of buying petrol and DERV (he still refers to Diesel in quaint Government-speak) simply siphon your juice out of your neighbour's motor"

Neighbours

Neighbours all over the country are said to be up in arms about this and Darling, the only Chancellor to share a name with a Blackadder character, is skating on thin ice with this one.

Hollyoaks

A spokesman for Hollyoaks commented that he can only afford to fill his motor up once a month.

Weatherfield & Walford

Stars like Peggy and Elsie Tanner from top soaps like Corrie and Eastenders are believed to be unconcerned about the rise. A spokesman for both shows said:

"They're all minted, that lot. So what's 2p to them?"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Tax, Gasoline




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