Euro Chaos for Britain!

Funny story written by Rodd Justice

Monday, 11 February 2002

image for Euro Chaos for Britain!
Signing up is the equivalent of raping the Queen

The Euro has been adopted amongst chaos by the twelve so-called nations on the continent. Now, there is a despicable push for Britain to adopt the currency!

It's hard to believe the audacity of these jumped up little Hitlers and their European, and therefore Nazi Marxist, plans for domination and control. When will they learn that it is they who are the subordinates? Have they forgotten that they failed to build their perfect societies in the Victorian era, so instead ruined our 20th century by constantly losing wars with us? Is it any coincidence that on the day they launch the Euro, a suspected attempt to get some asylums to sneak in the currency to our shores overnight on 31st December happens? No it isn't, that's rhetorical.

8 Good Reasons

In the pub this afternoon, I jotted down some anti-Euro ideas on a rogue napkin.

  1. Euro will still feel like 11 different currencies in the "Eurozone" because of the inter-nation accent difference.
  2. The Queen has not expressed a preference to join the Euro.
  3. Vaz.
  4. Signing up to the Euro is the equivalent of raping the Queen in the cupboard of a room where a paedophile riot is taking place.
  5. World War 2, soldiers lost lives, the Cenotaph.
  6. The economics aren't right, there would be a boom in plastic in response to a surge in demand for Kinder surprise toys and kegs.
  7. Euro would mean all currency transactions on British television would be badly dubbed (e.g. buying a cabbage from Mark's stall would be dubbed like a nip cartoon).
  8. Asylum seekers will no longer have to change currency, a time saving measure for their Channel Tunnel pursuits.

As it is, it is just a brainstorm of ideas, but it reflects 99' of public opinion*!

* Statistic not accurate.

The Propaganda!

As usual EU propaganda is all over the British media, and it proves the foreignist sympathisers who plan to soften us up to their barmy Euro takeover plan. Newsmen and politicians are claiming the introduction of the Euro to 12 simply incidental states is newsworthy. I think not, especially when there could instead be news of how the Queen is faring in her Jubilee Year. Long may she reign!

Amazingly, some MPs are planning to openly campaign on behalf of the sinister anti-Britain campaign, a.k.a. "Britain in Europe". The Britons have no protection from the evil forces of newist and foreignist influence, which wants to ruin Britain in the following ways:

  • Introduce confusing Euro currency
  • Make Catholicism compulsory
  • Establish so-called "Human Rights" legislation
  • Encourage European style paedophilia - in Paris it is considered ok to molest a child in public!

These evil schemes will be brought about by covert persuasion by MPs, politicans, lobby groups, newspapers, television - it is even suspected that the Euro takeover will be presented as a sensible topic for national debate by all the main political parties. How can we allow the anti-Britain lobby to soften us up? Who do they think they are?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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