Britain's Starred "The Fat Duck" Closes After Food Poisoning Scare

Funny story written by Bureau

Monday, 2 March 2009

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British Restaurant Owner Hospitalized For Nerves

Britain's Daily Telegraph says celebrity chef Heston Blumenthal has temporarily shut down his Michelin-starred restaurant amid a food poisoning scare.

The newspaper says Saturday that Blumenthal shut down The Fat Duck after dozens of guests reported feeling unwell. Health officials say initial tests came back negative, but Blumenthal decided to close the restaurant as a precaution.

"There's no use taking chances. If the Fat Dick caused somebody to die I'd just die myself. Did I say, Fat Dick? Oh my goodness don't print that. You see how upset I am," Blumenthal reportedly told the Telegraph who swore "not a word."

"But seriously, The Fart Duck has earned it's reputation over the past 13 years and I want to keep it that way. Now, I've said Fart Duck...didn't I? Don't print that either."

"Not a word."

Blumenthal opened The Fat Duck in 1995. The restaurant has been awarded three Michelin stars and is regularly voted among the best in the world. A sample menu for the exclusive restaurant cost 130 pounds ($185). A toothpick with a little flag, 50 pounds.

Often described as a "culinary alchemist," Blumenthal is known for unusual combinations such as scrambled egg and bacon ice cream and ham sherbet punch.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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