Arthur Pewty Named In Sex Scandal

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Wednesday, 15 October 2008


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I Don't Believe It

Burnley - 18/10/08 20:02PM BST - Straight off the wires - an ex friend of Arthur Pewty's, Mr Jimmy Bacon of Stoops Estate Burnley alleges that Arthur Pewty took home the fiancee of a mutual friend and indulged in some perverted hanky panky with her.

Bacon alleges that the mutual friend and the female in question were going through a difficult patch at the time, a situation the dastardly Pewty was determined to take advantage of. Bacon takes up the story:

'Our mate Jeff was going through a rough patch with his fiancee so he went out with another woman for a break like. But when he got home he found his fiancee in bed and Arthur Pewty's coat hanging behind the front door. No sign of Pewty of course. Long gone. But he confronted him as to why his coat was in his fiancee's house and Pewty denied any wrongdoing. I tell you, he's a proper shit house. Knobbing his mate's fiancee like that. It's just nasty. But then Arthur Pewty is a nasty bastard. Trust me.'

In response to the allegations lodged by Jimmy Bacon, Arthur Pewty laughed. 'I was at home that night and Jeff had gone out with another woman. His fiancee turned up at my place looking for him, and wishing to protect her from the terrible truth I accompanied her around town while she looked for him. At the end of the day it was getting decidedly cold, so I loaned her my sheepskin coat for her journey home. I didn't accompany her. Nothing happened. She returned the coat the following day. Jeff is a knob for thinking I'd do anything untoward, and Jimmy Bacon is a knob full stop.'

Beryl Pewty sat beside her gangster husband as this story unravelled looking like a volcano about to erupt.

We made our excuses and left, but we'll keep you posted.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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